Tuesday, October 1, 2013
The Adrenaline Crash
One nice thing about Facebook is that it lets me know I'm not alone. I've had this funk about me more or less since I got home yesterday. Part of it is exhaustion that I need to recover from, but it feels like I'm just depressed -- which, according to the throngs of folks that feel like me right now, is apparently pretty normal after running on adrenaline for five days.
Seriously, though. I actually cried when I got home. And not happy, glad to be home tears, either. It reminded me of when I actually did have "issues" and would just cry out of the blue for no reason at all. Stupid hormones. lol
Today I just didn't really feel anything. Work sucked. I didn't want to be there and almost called in, but I hadn't gotten around to checking my e-mail at all while I was gone and assumed I'd have a ton of stuff waiting for me. Not so much. Half the people seemed to think I wasn't going back to work until Wednesday anyhow, so I should have stayed home!
I actually felt like running tonight (weird, right?), but the lawn managed to actually grow some real grass (vs just weeds) while I was gone, so I mowed that instead. I also set up a few jumps and worked Kizzy for a bit. I'm actually feeling inspired to get her going now that the build-up to Champs is done.
I haven't put together my videos yet, but I have watched them (I'm missing one of Luke's, so I'm not sure if I'll start posting them before I get that or not...). Many times. The videos make me both happy and sad. I could not be more proud of all of my dogs. They all ran just fantastic in every single round. I am sad because I am extremely disappointed in myself. I know I'm being too hard on myself because it was mostly good, but *every single one* of Kaiser's errors was me, me, me. I really let my nerves get to me while running him and I have nobody to blame but myself for not reaching our full potential. He was amazing. He nailed every contact all week long -- all of our errors were me sending him off course. Sigh. I'm sure I'll stop hating myself soon enough, but for now the blame for not achieving my goals is squarely on me and I'm busy kicking myself. So often I say, "Oh, he's just being a Klee Kai." Or not. Maybe he's just doing exactly what I told him to do. He's such a trier.
Secret was pretty dang awesome, too. She really thrives off the energy at Champs. She has been getting faster overall for a while now, but she was cruising happy & fast down in Springfield. Part of me wonders how much of it is footing related. For financial and convenience reasons we obviously trial most frequently here in La Crosse -- it is no secret that their footing is not ideal and all three of my dogs tend to run more cautiously to avoid slipping. I think running weekend after weekend on that turf is detrimental to Secret's performance in the ring... Or I could be completely full of crap. Who knows. It will be interesting to see how she runs at the upcoming AKC trial I guess.
Luke did not put a foot wrong all week, so we will just ignore that little failed start line stay in the final round. ;o) I feel so blessed to have had these runs with the old man. And to think I was waffling on entering him at all. I guess he showed me!
Nobody was happier to be home than Kizzy. Immediately upon being released into the yard she reverted to a semi-feral state and ran around for a solid 30 minutes not letting me touch her. That was fun, considering I was trying desperately to get everyone treated for fleas after hearing about other owners finding them on their dogs down in Springfield. I didn't find any on mine, but honestly I didn't go looking, either. I knew that if I found any I would immediately shun my dogs and not let them near me. lol I can't help it... That was always an issue I had at the shelter. I'd be loving up on a new animal that came in and as soon as a flea was spotted it was like they had leprosy. Poor critters, they can't help it. So hopefully they didn't bring any friends home, but everyone is treated now and will hopefully be fine.
Meanwhile, I am now broker than broke and we probably won't be doing much trialing in the coming months. We'll plan on AKC this month and next. I don't particularly care for the person judging NADAC in November, so I don't have to feel bad about not attending that trial. We'll have to see about December, as Lorne will be in town and we quite enjoy him, plus there is no AKC that month. Perhaps Secret will get that month off and Kizzy will be ready to play? hahahahaha We'll see.....
Maybe a sugar high will get me out of my funk? I finally went through and sorted my goodie bags last night after I got home and this entire bag is candy.... I think they may have went a little overboard! One friend said she left it at the hotel for the workers. That was a good idea.... I'll probably end up taking it to work. Anyone want some candy?! I'm not eating it -- I actually lost four more pounds while at Champs! :o) Hooray for stress and not having time to eat.